Making Friends

It is fucking hard making friends.

I'll just say it. Making friends as an adult is awkward and weird and just plain complicated.

And it changes at different stages. Speaking as a mother, there are even different stages in which you make friends. Prenatally, you may just connect with another expectant woman because you're both growing little people and you're so hormonally driven that you fucking need to bond and talk about hemorrhoids and your vagina and shit. But then you have the kid and you're suddenly split into camps; are you breastfeeding, cloth diapering, going back to work, etc. You have to choose which team you're on because every decision you make regarding your child feels so huge and big and important.

But then your kids get older and you realize your kids have opinions about who they hang with and you have opinions so everyone has somethin' to say and now you have to figure that piece out.

But then one day you realize you can make a friend that doesn't revolve around playdates and you really don't fucking care if your kids even like each other because the fact is you really like this other person. And that's so great, it really is.

I'm not sure what will come of the friendships in my life. I certainly hope I can grow and nurture the friendships that are meaningful. And I feel some sadness over friendships that have morphed into something else. But I'm trusting that I will continue to grow my circle when the time is right.